After dominating the home tie, over confidence and deadly defensive errors gave Spurs the chance to salvage a late 4-4 draw from Arsenal in the game's closing stages.
"We played too cautious. They were there for the taking and instead of scoring five or six we had a negative passing game, just by keeping possession," Wenger told Sky Sports.
"Then you expose yourself and in football you always have to try to go forward."
Despite his apparent dismay at the result, Wenger showed faith in his young team.
"The team has outstanding potential but they are maturing and need to be guided in the decisive moments. They will learn from moments like tonight.
"I believe that we wanted to win the game and were absolutely, certainly two levels above Tottenham today, but in the end we don't get the points."
The thrilling draw left Arsenal third in the Premiership table with 20 points from 10 games.